That was my Facebook status a bit after I learned about what happened in Newtown, CT: no words.
I could not put words to what I was feeling, to what had happened, to the idea of someone going into an elementary school, like the one where my daughter attends, and opening fire on small children; children that use words like "bad guys," referring to a character from Batman, not a man in their school.
A blogger friend of mine just wrote that as a blogger, she was feeling a desire to post about the tragedy, "write something profound...and yet (she) can only...pray for the families that have been traumatized". That friend inspired me to open my Wordpress account and click "New Post."
I have just returned from a dear friend's home with several other dear friends and their families. We lit the last candle on the menorah, and as a group of 15 sang the Hebrew prayers blessing the Chanukah lights.
We were celebrating a young man returning from his first semester of college, my son's acceptance to college, as well as being together as a "family" and being blessed with health, safety and peace. I suggested that we also sing the Shehecheyanu, which is a prayer that is said during special occasions; when one is thankful for special experiences. It was so beautiful that it brought tears to my eyes.
I think of the lights that are being lit at the vigils for the victims of Sandy Hook. I think of the lights that were lit Saturday night at Lake Anne at a vigil to stop gun violence. And, I think about all of the candles that were lit in homes all over on this last night of Chanukah. There were some Jewish children that were killed in the massacre; their Chanukah lights were not lit. I pray that our lights somehow shone on their memory.
May all of their memories be a blessing.